DRAMA: PUNKS VS. OPEN MIC CLOWNS @ NOTSUOH!!

What's the worst thing about an open mic performer without a guitar? It means they are going to tell jokes instead! Whether or not that's the case, there was some serious goings on last night at Notsuoh. We'll let eyewitness Chris Ryan (Dead City Sound, Port of Lebanon and White) spell out all the details. BLOCK QUOTE:

ok so every monday night at notsuoh there is some crazy magic that goes on. mostly in the form of an open mic night hosted by this dude richie (old houston drunk art dude). the [non open mic] show last night had been booked for months, featured bands that drove all the way from portland (clorox girls) and L.A. (silver daggers, who were pretty much mind blowing), and had a decent turn out. (from here on out i will refer to them as the "punk bands").

well no one told the open mic night people, and god forbid they just let the touring bands have their show. so in true monday night fashion (rosa and i are veterans of the notsuoh monday night, we went every monday for about 2 months because inevitably something magic happened every time.) anyway in true monday night fashion richie decides that it's going to be a mix of punk show and open mic night. so around 10pm the first act, which is richie's girl friend playing out of tune violin, goes on and bores the shit out of everyone. then cop warmth plays and does the normal cop warmth thing, followed by open mic night acoustic guitar player which you can imagine is fucking wonderful. okay so etc etc this pattern continues with punk bands killing it followed by shitty open mic night acts killing whatever fun vibe had be created.

also i have to mention during this time there is an old guy going up to the punk bands while they are playing and yelling at them telling them they suck. that's when i threw him in the "pit" (dance party) during total abuse. he's pretty pissed off and starts talking shit on the mic after total abuse is done, telling them to go back to the garage. this is when i get into a shouting match with him and ask him to show us his band and his records and ask him what he has done that is so fucking great etc etc and basically tell him he is an old jaded piece of shit. so then he wanted to fight me, but he knew there were like 20 other people wanting to kick his ass so he just hit on girls for the rest of the night. but that's just a side note to the awesomeness of the rest of the night....

so anyway it's like 12:15 and i have to mention that the punk bands are all playing short sets, 10-15 minutes to make sure everyone gets to play, while the open mic people are doing the typical "i can play forever because people like me" thing, even though all night there are 3 people inside while the open mic night dudes play, and it's packed for the punk bands. so at 12:15 this girl gets up with her acoustic guitar and starts playing just really horrible shit. 45 minutes pass. not joking. she is STILL PLAYING. so one of the girls from finally punk (who is pretty wasted by this point) just walks up the stage in the middle of her song and tells her to stop playing! the girl gets REALLY pissed and starts breaking wine glasses and shit and richie (also wasted) grabs the finally punk girl and starts pulling her away from the stage and finally punk girls boyfriend (drummer of total abuse) punches richie in the face. then it's like 30 second punk band/open mic night brawl on the floor followed by the two girls screaming at each other. things calmed down a little but finally punk girl starts dancing around flipping off the open mic people while jim pirtle starts playing Baba O'Riley by The Who on the record player and there's that awesome solo guitar part and everyone starts clapping to the music and dancing around while flipping off the open mic night people. it's pretty great, but then ritchie try to grab the finally punk girl again and she spits right in his face, and he shoves her and then the whole punk/open mic night 30 second brawl happens again and richie's girlfriend drags him out of the place and silver daggers go on and destroy it followed by clorox girls ending everything with a cover of wolly bully. oh sorry, actually a half naked, barely able to stand jim pirtle ends everything singing a sloppy rendition of "light my fire" with a glass of whiskey in hand.

Mind blowing. The Rosa referred to early on in the post is none other than reliable scene photographer and Mutant Hardcore Flower Hour dj Rosaposer. It has been reported that she captured the night in film - you will see them as soon as we do.